glumbert

First!

This was stupid.

The Skinwalkers video preview sucks even more.

Next they'll be putting adverts behind our posts.

i thought it was clever.

religion meets real world for a change (albeit via satire)

I guess it's open season on everything, including ideals and beliefs and all sorts of notions ardently held close to the heart.

For those needing the spotlight of public awareness, one way to do so is to attack or ridicule popularly held beliefs. "Clever" doesn't really describe the easily managed theatrics of this piece.

Stilted, unimaginative, insensitive, corrupted, abrupt, insulting, sensationalist, soulless, stupid, uncreative, and empty...not necessarily in that order....are a few descriptors that come to mind. Given a few more minutes, I'd have a few more to offer.

humor my friends , we have been taken religion so seriously for so long .....well billions dead and counting.

but i just love the debate thoe.

i learn so much, no shit from every body getting involved and having a say so . you cant beat it .

i dont think he would harm any one, its not in his caricature . lol
at least i hope not! lmao lolololol.

yes but you see the differance between these posts and those over there, you know what i mean?

Maybe they can show videos of ads next.

A conversation with God:

Streamlined: "Hey dude, whyed ya get wit my woman like dat."
God: "I am God, no explanation necessary. I do what I want."
Streamlined: "Buh, hey dude, whatta bout da commandments? Day don't apply to youz?"
God: "No, they are for mankind"
Streamlined: "But ya boinked my woman, and now shez planted dawg! I'm not taking care of dat kid!"
God: "Hmmm"
Streamlined: "Hey dawg, ya didnt even show up for the show. Wats up wit dat?"
God: "I am everywhere, but I'm currently needed elsewhere. Gotta go!"
Streamlined: "I think I was screwed by God too!"

Observed the next day: God was later spotted packing up his things and moving to another universe.

Well. Guess who called to talk to me...

God "Podman?"
Me: "Yes God?"
God: "I have been made aware of what you are saying here!"
Me: "How did you know?"
God: "Streamlined 'Been Snitchen' to me."
Me: "I knew he would."
God: "Why are bothering Mr. Stream?"
Me: "It's his blind devotion God. He seems a little down, and I was just trying to make him laugh."
God: "You have been sticking it to Me pretty good here. And you are the first to point out that Ten Commandments Faux Paus. I was a little younger then, and I got around some."
Me: "yes, me too."
God: "You are right though. All those zealots are making my ears bleed. And the whining about all the small stuff. Do you know that a Canadian woman once thanked me for finding her keys! Geez get a life! Don't they know, I don't do keys!."
God: "Podman - Just between you, Me. I have been laughing my infinite ass off! But don't forget to be respectful as well."
Me: (looking down at my shoes) "OK"

Thought the video was well done and very funny...portrayed those shows exactly as they appear on television except..."whoz yo daddy?" was the ultimate daddy in this one.
However...hopefully the next show won't be "God, you're NOT the father!" another repeat of these type of shows in which the slut on the show has appeared 9 times and still hasn't figured out who the father is...so sad.

So I agree wholeheartly with the comment from grueslayer.

Randal, yes folks have been taking religion seriously because it is a large part of so many of their lives. To me, it's okay to lighten up any and all subjects with humor. But you are so right that millions have died for their religious beliefs and in many religous wars...because

..." our imaginary God is greater than your imaginary God" ...

(George Carlin)


Amen.

Grueslayer...I appreciate your view...made me step back and reconsider. My first impression was a bit negative, to say the least. Still don't like the piece, but have to admit that, objectively, it is funny. Trouble is, it's sometimes hard to remain objective. Thanks for the wake-up call.

Podman: "God are you there?"
God: "Yes Podman, what is it?"
Podman: " I have read that GWB, and Cheney are consulting you on the war."
God: "Who?"
Podman: "Our current President and VP of the US."
God: "Who?"
Jesus: "Dad. I have them here, but neither of them have talked to us since they were 12."
God: "I wonder whats going on. Who have they bee talking to?"
Podman: "Um God? thats OK. I think I have my answer. Till next time OK"
God: "OK. You be good now."
Podman: "You know that I am always being good."

and for the video, how old was Jesus when thay had the blood test done?
joe seems to be all up in that babys face . wonder who the real father is?

Joe: "Eb - I have a problem?"
Eb: "What is it Joe?"
Joe: "My wife is pregnant, but she says the baby isn't mine."
Eb: "Well I think you can work this out."
Joe: "Well.. The other guy has Everything, power, money, and all I have is this old cart and the one mule."
Eb: "Does she still love this guy?"
Joe: "OH Yes. And I do too. Hes is my best friend."
Eb: "What are you going to do?"
Joe: "Well I don't have much, but with the baby coming an all... What are we going to do."
Eb: "Don't worry the other kings and I will pitch in and it will be OK"
Joe: "Thanks Eb. I been thinking of a name beginning with 'J'.
Eb: "Jesus - Joe where you going to live?"
Joe: "Thats it! Jesus. Thanks. The wife and I just put in a bid on a hut in Nazerith. I hope the loan is approved."

LMFAO at Podster!

Pod!

Ya ever think of being a playwright?

Hell of an imagination!

Funny, too.

lol

I love this video. I find religious zealots to be a pain in the ass and enjoy anything that might question their dogma or put it into a different light. People who are self righteous and claim to know everything suck. I guess I'm bitter about some of my "christian" "friends".

Podman... good job. That was funny.

well, i guess he will own that part of cybor space for now .
i have noticed that stream is not on the rest of these( how you say)
strings??
hmmm........ and this one seems to be right up his alley, actually it should get his temperature up . i would think .

stream why arent you sounding off on this page i know your peering in.
of that im certain.
so why not ???

:/

randal...I haven't read every Emmet Fox book..but know of his work. Please note my comment to your long response that was erased due to "googling".

Someone called this morning (Imagine a thin squeaky voice, and add 4000 years of smoking)


Satin: "Podman?"
Podman: "Who is this?"
Satin: "It's satin Podman."
Podman: "Who?"
Satin: (Voice even thinner with coughing) "The prince of (coughing) Darkness"
Podman: "Who?"
Satin: "It's Carl Rove Podman."
Podman: "Oh, Carl! God told me why you only call at night."
Carl: "Who? - Well anyway - I don't have much time, the sun is almost up. You told the Glummies about GW!"
Podman: "I said nothing, and God is checking the whole thing out." (A squeaking noise heard here)
Carl: "That is going to be a problem (coughing and straining), I have to get GW 'Elected' again, and I think things are turning against me."
Podman: "Another term Carl? The presidency is only two terms, and Carl It's supposed to be difficult, you are on the other team. (Carl - grunting) It would not be so hard to re-arrange your dirt if you would lose a little weight. Twinkies are not a food group, and maybe you should try the whole thing, instead of just sucking out the filling."
Carl: (A loud plopping sound heard here) "Ahhh, that feels good! Podman you must stop revealing my secrets. How will I continue my control over more than the simple minded?"
Podman: "News flash Carl! They were all you ever had. - And Carl, I'm putting this up on Glumbert as well."
Carl: (Talking on other line) "Dark master I think you have to smite Podman."
Podman: "Carl! Carl! - I heard you on the other line."
Carl: "What! - I have to go. (a heavy lid thumps closed)
Podman: "What a dork!. - Always at night! - What a control freak! - I hope his SPF2000 fails someday!"

Sister Boom-Boom, was a transvestite nun, that ran for mayor of San Francisco in 1982. He/she received more than twenty thousand votes.

Totally useless info

Jesus on the playground.... (8 years after birth of J.C.)

Bully: I'm gonna kick your ass.
J: Leave me alone! I'm jesus! don't you know?
Bully: you're wimpy. you have long hair. get out of the boys' bathroom. Go to the girls bathroom you little girl!
J: no! Leave me alone or I'll... I'll ... or I'll...
Bully: you'll what? You'll turn the other cheek?
J: why can't we all just get along!!!
Bully: because you're a Jew. I'm gonna kick your ass.
J: you should try this circumcision thing... it's really great by the way. I feel much cleaner
Bully: stop trying to distract me from kicking your ass with getting into that gay shit. Now stand up and fight like a man!!!
J: leave me alone!!! Stop pulling my hair
Bully: pussy!!!!
J: My dad is gonna kick your ass!!!
Bully: whatever. I'm gonna kill you in about 28 years.
J: I love you.
Bully: shuttup fag! (thump! thump! kick!)
J: hey!! Stop it!! Dad said you're supposed to have some sort of morality!!!
Bully: shuttup you pussy. I'm a sinner just like your dad said
J: leave me a lone!!!
Bully: You kissed Mary Magdalene... I saw you.
J: shuttup!! I'm gonna kick your ass!!!

I could go on but I won't....

... or maybe I will...

Satan: Fight Fight Fight!!!!! everyone!!! There's a fight in the boys' bathroom!!!
God: Oh Jesus... here we go again.

The following takes place between 8:00 and 11:00 am.

GOD: randel get up.

Randal:zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

GOD: randal get up.

Randel:zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

GOD:randal get up now

Randal:zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

GOD:RANDAL WAKE THE #@*%**#@ UP!!!!!!!!

Randal:zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

GOD: RANDAL, THIS LIGHTING BOLT IS GOING.....................
............ ahhhh screw this im going over to Pods house.

Randal:zzzzzzzzzz(fart).......(snort)zzzzzzzzzzzz

Oh Boy! We are gonna start having some fun now!

Yahoo!

Carpentry 101 ( the family workshop )

Jesus is sawing some Gopher wood.

Joe is planing some Oak.

Swink, Swink, Swink, Swi.. Clack.

Joe: "Jesus Christ!!! "
Jesus: "Joe, what happened?"
Joe: "Jesus can you put it back on again?"
Jesus: "Joe are you certain carpentry is your primary skill? I've put this thumb back on six times now!"
Joe: "Jesus, as long as you are here it doesn't really matter does it?"
Jesus: "Joe you and your wacky accidents have really prepared me for my future journeys."
Joe: "It's your fathers doing. I don't really think I'm really this bad with tools."

Three years later. Jesus is in the desert seeking meaning, and Joe is in his workshop.

Joe is planing some wood when Mary walks in.

Swink, Swink, Swink, Swi.. Clack.

Joe: "Jesus Christ!!! "
Mary: "Joe! - Not again!"
Joe: "Get me that tourniquet!"
Mary: "I will put this one with the other three, Ok?"
Joe: "When is he coming home? I need some fixing here."
Mary: "God said his trials will be over soon. Be patient."

(Joe is Looking at Mary with his one good eye. A tear of pain running down.)

Joe: "His trials! -- What about me! That boy was right I'm just not good with tools!"

where did billboat go to? i

wonder

LOLOL

You guys.

Too fuckin' much...lmfao

Loved it all...the dialogue...the script...all of it...lol

Popular imagination has added an interesting slant to the story of the woman taken in adultery. You know the story: The Pharisees bring the woman before Jesus for judgment and Jesus says, "Let the person who is without sin cast the first stone." They fell silent, and then, all of a sudden a stone came flying from the crowd. Jesus looks up, surprised and amused, and then says, "Hold it, mother... I am trying to make a point, here."

Do you ever wonder if glumbert enjoys posting controversial things just so they can laugh their asses at these arguments?

I think we have all read enough of weak-streams rhetoric to kinda build of an image of the fellow. The closest thing I can find to what I imagine is this:

http://www.glumbert.com/media/bloggerlife

Perhaps he uses the name streamlined, because he isn't.

Holy CRAP! You boys have been busy. It'll take me a day just to catch up. Good fun!

(My kitchen - 6:33 AM)

Jesus: "Podman, go t a minute?"
Podman: "Morning J. I haven't had my coffee yet."
Jesus: "Understood."

(My deck - 7:03 AM)

Jesus: "Podman? Can you talk?"
Podman: "Ok - whats up?"
Jesus: "Is it safe?"
Podman: "Ouch! Son of a...! Jesus that Running Man bit is getting old."
Jesus: "I know but you look tired."
Podman: "My Air Conditioner is broken J. I'm not getting any sleep."
God: "Podman?"
Podman: "Yes God?"
God: "I just want to thank you for not asking me to fix your Air Conditioner. You get extra points for that there."
Jesus: "Dad! I'm talking to him, and I know you have other things to do!"
Podman: "J what is it?"
Jesus: "Is it safe?"
Podman: (cringing here in expectation) "Ah - no J it is not safe."
Jesus: "You know that I need the Human perspective on this second coming thing. I need input."
Podman: "I will do my best. There are more zealots down here than ever. There are people down here waiting for something they call "The Rapture", and there is a large group who are following the Bible literally."
Jesus: "Pod - you always open with these funny jokes, but what is really going on?"
Podman: "J - This is what is going on! It's not a joke."
Jesus: "Literally you say. Humm. But the Bible is all screwed up now. All those translations!"
God: (Voice from a distance) "That Babel thing was a mistake."
Jesus: "Dad!!! Trying to talk here! Pod is it safe?"
Podman: "Holy Christ! It - is - not - safe!.
God: "Remember what happened last time Son!"
Podman: "J what is this rapture thing?"
Jesus: "I dunno. Dad what is the Rapture?"
God: "The what?"
Podman: "J I have to go to work. Anything else?"
Jesus: "No that it. (Yelling) Dad, do have any thing for Podman?"
God: (In a loud booming voice) "Podman this is your Lord God and I say unto you. Get Some Sleep!"
Podman: "You guys crack me up! The Holy comedians. Bye guys."

(The laundry room)

God: "Podman. You there?"
Podman: "Yes God. You know I am."
God: "You asked about this is thing called 'The Rapture'. What do you know about this?"
Podman: "In brief I think it is supposed to be some sort of Holy Hoovering of souls up to Heaven. And you are going to be in charge of the whole thing."
God: "Any specifics on how this is decided?"
Podman: "From what I have heard it is just for republican evangelicals. They get sucked up there with you, and they leave their clothes and everybody else behind."
God: "Naked. Here. Really? (shouting) Jesus - Order coverings for all the furniture!"
Podman: "That's funny. But that's how I heard it. It has been predicted many many times."
God: "So... What do they say that I'm supposed to do with those who don't undergo the 'Holy Hoovering'?"
Podman: "I don't know about that part. But I think the rest of us are in Hell at that point."
God: "OK, I have it now. Thanks for the perspective."
Podman: "Anytime."

What happens in Glumbertville...STAYS in Glumbertville...

Hey Glumbert! When do we get our T-shirts?

I have been saying glummies.

Time to turn off the lights.


(click)

Eeeee! I'm afraid of the dark.

(Click) - OK Ralph take my hand.

(Click)

hehehe. nice Satire.

podman need help i think