Fuck you Baltimore! If you're dumb enough to buy a new car this weekend, You're a big enough schmuck to come to Big Hell's cars! Bad deals! Cars that break down! If you think you're gonna find a bargain at Big Hell's, You can kiss my ass! It's our belief that you're such a stupid motherfucker, that you'll fall for this bullshit! Guaranteed! If you find a better deal, shove it up you ugly ass! You heard us right! Shove it up your ugly ass! Bring you trade, bring you title, bring your wife! We'll fuck her! That's right we'll fuck your wife! Because at Big Bill Hell's, you're fucked six ways from Sunday! Take a hike! To Big Bill Hell's, home of challenge pissing! That's right, challenge pissing! How does it work? If you can piss 6 feet in the air, straight up, and not get wet, you get NO DOWN PAYMENT! Don't wait! Don't delay! Don't fuck with us, or we'll rip you nuts off! Only at Big Bill Hell's, the only dealer that tells you to fuck off! Hurry up asshole! This event ends the minute after you write us a check, and it better not bounce or you're a dead mother fucker! Go to Hell! Big Bill Hell's Cars! Baltimore's filthiest and exclusive home of the meanest sons of bitches, in the state of Maryland! Guaranteed!
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