And how did you acquire this fear? Did you have a dream of laying on a bed covered in Saran Wrap while Rosie O'Donnell and yourself smothered yourself in creamed corn and then licked it off one another?
He's got about as much credibility as Jerry Springer (hell, at least Springer is honest about the trash he puts out, and never pretends his show has any socially redeeming value!).
Ze Kapitan of ze Hindenberg had ein similar phobia.
I myself haf only von phobia. I cannot be near an armadillo vith von leg. So I try to shoot zem on sight.
How very bizarre! There are indeed a multitude of irrational fears out there, don't you agree? I think that being forced to confront these phobias in a controlled environment is a valid curative tool, but surely this setting was neither the time nor the place to do this? It seems to me that the whole sorry spectacle was for the benefit of the viewers, rather than this unfortunate woman. By the way, did anone else notice what a fabulous rump she had? When she ran up the stairs, it moved like a rolling field of corn, and her Nubian breasts bobbed beautifully like an Arab dhow on a choppy sea. Her fearful eyes, imploring, pleading for release from her inner torment. Aaaaaaiieeeeeerghhhh! Sppppppllllhhhh! Garrrrrrrrrrrrugh! Well. That's so much better now. I must attend to my laundry.
Pistaker, if there were anyone here on Glumbert that was a 45 year old balding man that has pictures of kids all over his walls, I think it would be you. You just sell that creepiness thing really well. Also: Please stay away from me.
I find your tone and insinuations faintly insulting. I wish to let it be known that I am neither 45 nor balding, and certainly have no pictures of minors anywhere in my apartment. I may indeed be "creepy" in the eyes of some, but my creepiness extends only to adults of either sex and inanimate objects over the age of consent.
And, worry not, I have no intention of being anywhere near you.
And THAT was the single most frightening response I have ever received. Although I do feel inclined to thank you for never approaching me, instead I will simply end this comment with a haiku in your honor...
Another comment? Pistaker might swing both ways No one knows for sure
Indeed no. That was a statement of my philosophy of life. I now have to leave my desk to tend my collection of Amazon Basin carnivorous plants. They become irksome if not fed flesh at least twice a day. Have a restful and fulfilling evening.
Yours respectfully
Cedric Fortescue-Pistaker
Phallus Mansion
East Grinstead
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